Polly Still Has That Need For Speed
January 25th, 2012

Yep, it looks to me like I'm still on some weird-ass Sonic The Hedgehog kick. After Generations, I found myself digging back through the series' Genesis roots again as well as finishing off Sonic Colors on the Wii, and I still have Unleashed hanging around on the backburner somewhere for review this year. Then last week, Sega made the out-of-left-field decision to release Sonic The Hedgehog 4: Episode 1 on Steam, further feeding my need for high-speed hijinks. I played through the game in a few days and figured I may as well have my say on it, because what's the point of having a website if the world can't know your super-important opinions on everything, including games that everyone has already talked to death?

And I know that's just not enough for some of you out there. IT NEVER IS! That's why good ol' Fat Kakashi and decoy octopus have yet another installment of their Secret of Mana 2 Tag-Team Let's Play for that ass! This game isn't an Endurance Run, it's an Endurance Shuffle To The Nearest Map Exit!

And that'll be all for now. GET OUT! Don't make me get the hose...


-PollyBoomPollyBoomPollyBoooooom

An Update of Colossal Size
January 15th, 2012

It's SUNDAY! But fear not, for your Emergency Boring Sunday Funpack has been equipped with not one, but TWO supreme-sized updates to help you fend off your case of the Dreary Boring Sunday Blues! Why bother going outside on a cold day like today when all you need is the warm glow of your monitor and all these words and videos spread out across it to keep you company?

First up, our promised colossal-sized update from one Remnant. Turns out he's late to the party (AS ALWAYS! HMPH!) and only just got around to playing Sony's oft-hyped adventures in giant killing simulator, Shadow of the Colossus. The big pink link obviously means that he's written quite an in-depth review for it, and since you got poop else to do today, you may as well go ahead and journey through his thoughts on this fantastic game.

And if giant killing isn't enough for you, how about some magical adventures? Well, that's what Fat Kakashi and decoy octopus have cooked up for you today with the shiniest, newest installment of their tag-team Let's Play of Secret of Mana 2. Always be shuffling to the right folks. Always be shuffling.

And there's your Sunday update!


-Pollyisn'tsocolossal

SMPS.Net Going Black January 18th To Protest PIPA/SOPA
January 14th, 2012

This is just a quick announcement that, like many other sites, Socksmakepeoplesexy.Net will be going black January 18th to protest against the Stop Online Piracy Act (SOPA) AS WELL AS PIPA.

This means that the entire site (including forums) will display only a blank black page. We're not going away forever, but hey, if this legislation gets out of hand, there's nothing to say we wouldn't be forced to in the future by any entity that gets a wild hair up their ass about anything we do here just because the government empowered them to. Granted, they're backpedaling pretty hard on certain parts of the bill (specifically the DNS blocking provisions), but there's more to be done and more to be said, and that's why I'm choosing to participate.

I understand that in the grand scheme of things we're a virtual nobody in the Internet Land at large compared to the other participants, but sites like mine also stand a huge risk of being hit with any number of lame-ass excuses to be censored or shut down because this nonsense is so far-reaching.

Look at January 18th as a "taste of things to come" should this bill be passed.


-PollySOPASucks

Gotta Go Fast! Unless Your Name Is Kaz-slo!
January 10th, 2012

Welcome back, everybody, to an all-new Socksmakepeoplesexy.Net adventure! What kinda crazy adventures and wacky hijinks will we be getting into today? NONE! Because here at the SMPS.Net, we're god damn serious all the god damn time, you better god damn believe it! If you can't be serious about your videogames and Japanese Cartoons, then what can you be serious about? Am I right?

Of course I'm right, that's why when I seriously sat down to play Sega's latest installment in their surviving-only-on-life-support flagship Sonic The Hedgehog series, I had only the most serious and no-nonsense Major League Gaming mindset. Could my cold-as-ice gaze and iron grip on gamepad mentality possibly softened, even a tad? Find out by clicking here and reading my full review of Sonic Generations on the PC/PS3/XBorx 360 to find out if Sega is still flailing its arms about in a fit of not knowing what the fuck it wants to do.

Now, you guys know me. I'm not the kinda gal that'll tolerate tardiness, no matter what excuse you could possibly dream up. I don't even care if you're one of my friends, like say Kazlo, and you had a good excuse, like you were off wanking it to pink anthropomorphic pony girls. The very fact that Kazlo turned in his Games of the Year 2011 List as late as he did was enough for me to let decoy bite his left arm off. And no, I didn't call the ambulance afterward. He shoulda been on time like the rest of us.

And hey, ya know what? Extra plug for Crono Maniac's Silent Hill 2 article just in case anybody missed it.

Lastly, I wanna say a huge "awesome job" and "you guys are a good reason to still believe in humanity" to the Speed Demos Archive guys for the success of their Awesome Games Done Quick Marathon the last six days to benefit the fight against cancer. So many fantastic gaming feats mixed with the generosity of others to combat an evil disease that has likely affected all of us. Your efforts are to be commended. Rest well, you guys. Nobody's more deserving.


-Pollythehatehog

Silent New Year's!
January 5th, 2012

Welp, those silly ol' holidays are now behind us, end of the year lists from every single website on the planet are wrapped up, and it's time for us all to suck it up and get back to the regular old grind. And hey, lucky for you, that also includes brand-spanin' new updates right here on your favorite website!

And maaaaan, are we starting the year off with a doozy. Never let it be said that we here at SMPS.Net don't know how to get things kicked off on a fresh new year. Actually, never let it be said that our boy Crono Maniac doesn't know how to get shit started with his long-awaited follow-up up to the feature he started last year for Silent Hill 2. Scared yet? You should be. Turns out there's plenty to say about one of survival horror's most revered franchises, and he's only just getting started. So, hip-hop on over there and give it a read.

And we're done here for today!


-Pollyscaredyou