Super Xalaxer (CLICK TO PLAY FOR FREE!)
Platform: PC Flash Game
Created by: Rhete
Author's Website: http://inconsequentialexistence.com/

Resident Socksmakepeoplesexy.Net "I Make Games Guy," Rhete is at it again with another fresh dose of AWESOME-ASS FLASH GAME, ready to burrow its way right into your eyeball holes and test the tenacity of both your reflexes and coordination. And maybe drive you a little crazy in the process.

Super Xalaxer is the full-featured sequel to 2009's Xalaxer, a top-down "survive as long as you can" experimental shmup in which the player must control TWO spaceships at once moving only left and right, without letting enemies pass the bottom of the screen. It was a simple and nicely executed idea that I saw break plenty of people in mere minutes, and the sequel not only corrects some minor issues with the original, but builds upon its simple and approachable mechanics in all the right ways. 

The core of the Xalaxer experience remains much the same: Control two ships at once, (choosing to do so with either a mouse+keyboard or having both ships on the keyboad), mow down swaths of enemies with continuous laser fire, and JUST LIVE! Enemies can only damage either ship via fired shots or upon exiting the screen. 

This time around however, some structure has been added to the mix with Arcade Mode, changing the game from an endless onslaught of anxiety into a more manageable nine-stage fully fleshed out game with a beginning and an end. Progress is saved between each area, so it's easy to put it down and come back later should you feel the need. 

Progression throughout Arcade Mode scales very well, with every stage adding a new gimmick to the mix, such as killer asteroids or enemies that can fire.  Even cooler is that most stages end in boss encounters that will push your awareness and reaction to their limits. The stages remain varied throughout the simple gameplay by bouncing back and forth between restricting each ship to one side of the screen or opening up the entire playfield for full left and right movement. You can also select from three difficulty modes to further fine-tune your experience with the game. 

Also new to Super Xalaxer are simple power-ups that enhance the width of your automatic fire, making it easier to tear through the seemingly endless hordes of enemies, with four collected power ups granting you a momentary FUCKYEAH DEATH LASER to shred every motherfucker ever. A score attack mode is available for every stage of the game you complete, which saves the highest number of enemies destroyed per area until your wussy little reflexes finally gave out.

Though you'll be cutting down enemies that number in the thousands per-stage, in time, it all starts looking and feeling like an intricate dance of hellfire and gritted teeth as you lay waste to everything that enters the screen. Super Xalaxer is demanding, but not insurmountable. It's a game where you'll just acquire a feel for it, and it'll immediately feel satisfying when you're finally able to see the credits roll. 

So, come on! What's a little bit of time and lost sanity between you and a talented, yet demented game developer? It's FREE, fairly short, and it's super radpants as well! You're not doing anything else right now anyway, so why not give Super Xalaxer a shot and thank me later!

OH AND ALSO I COMPOSED MOST OF THE SOUND EFFECTS SO I'M IMPORTANT! GO PLAY IT NOW! STOP READING THIS!