Sudoku? Suikoden? Nope, Can't Think Of Anything Else!
August 31st, 2010

And today we close out another action packed month here in SMPS.Net land. Another pretty good run, if I do say so myself. This lucky update made it just in time, because my copy of Metroid: Other M is set to arrive tomorrow and it's not likely I'll be doing jack squat until I finish it. I'll also be reviewing it, so keep your dirty guest contributatan paws off.

Anyway, onto today's update! Good ol' forum chap and harbinger of the donut apocalypse, Beepner has a review of the somewhat obscure XBOX/PC wannabe JRPG Sudeki. Beepner is the only other person I've ever known to actually know about this game, and even then I never knew there was a Windows port. He's got a lot of fun things to say about it and you should read it. Unless, ya know, you don't care about the future of donuts...

Alright, I got a mission to complete. Catch you folks on the other side of the galaxy!


-Pollysusomethingorother

Spend Your Sunday With A Nice, Proper, and Quiet Girl
August 22nd, 2010

I reeeeeally hope you didn't think that title was referring to little ol' me!

Since it's Sunday, you deserve to sit back, relax, and have a nice spot of tea as I regale you with all of my very important and very right thoughts about American McGee's Alice on PC. I got a bit of an itch to play through it again last weekend and decided I could barf some words up about it, so you be sure to enjoy your barf tea. It's brewed especially for you and sweetened with all of my own fond memories.

And barf.

Polly barf.

What really got me interested in playing the game again all these years later was watching my good friend The Hutch Let's Play it recently, so I was happy as a turd on a trolley (wut?) to have a chance to revisit this classic and blabber about it a little. I mean, it's the game that's also pretty much responsible for my initial attraction to Higurashi no Naku Koro ni, so that makes it even more special now. I guess you could say I always go for the sweet and silent girls. So, you go read that and watch Hutch's Let's Play. He's one entertaining motherfucker!

Oh, and hey! Me and some of the gang over at the SnS forums will be participating in a Shmup Tournament starting this week. Be sure to root for Team Sexy Socks! We're gonna suck so bad that we'll redefine "suck so bad!"

Adios!


-Pollyhateswritingmainpageblurbs

Make Like A Tree And Read!
August 17th, 2010

Hey, hey! Welcome back to the PLACE WHERE IT'S HAPPENIN' 24 HOURS A DAY! Got some fresh review today, so why not have a read?

About a week ago I was sittin' around the ol' Polly cave bored out of my mind, so I decided to put out a call for people to send me random ROMs to play to ease my boredom and the one I decided to play through would be reviewed for the site. Our own FreezingInferno heeded that call (as did a few others, who may also see their suggestions appear sometime) and his entry won.

Strange thing happened though, when I decided to start reviewing the game after playing through it. I got the crazy idea to try something a little bit different. So, today myself and FreezingInferno BOTH present to you our tag-team, back and forth review of Super Back To The Future Part II on Super Famicom.

This is the first time I've collaborated with anyone else this involved in the review process and it was a pretty fun experience. Whether you enjoy it is up to you, but we had a great time doing it and it may be an option for a review or two in the future, maybe even with other guests, should I get the inspiration to do it again. Hope you enjoy!

Also, featured into today's review are a number of pieces of art dedicated to the visage of our FreezingBurning one. These pieces are quite cool and were done by Frezpot's cool artisty friend Ichii. So you should be good little readers and go have a look at her MangaBullet profile and enjoy the various works in her gallery!

'Till next time, kiddos.


-PollyToTheFuture

Robots 'n Ninjas 'n Robot Ninjas!
August 13th, 2010

...I mean, really. What else do I even have to say about today's update than the title? It's officially the best update ever. Might as well just give up even having hopes of topping it! THAT'S IT! SITE'S OVER! EVERYBODY GO HOME!

Or not...

I've been reviewerizing a lot of newer and modern videroogames lately, and this past weekend I got a tiny bit bored of that and dragged out the ol' SNES on a whim to see if there was anything I hadn't played in a while that could whet the ol' appetite for some old-school style brain rotting. What I found was a sorta-buried little title I'd almost forgotten that goes by the almost uninspiring name, Ninja Warriors. With a name like that, I guess it'd be kinda easy to forget though, but is the game as forgettable?

ENJOY YOUR FRIDAY THE GOD DAMN THIRTEENTH!


-Pollyninjabot

Giant Robots and Kitty Cats?
August 11th, 2010

Ahhh, another day, another nice piece of Guest Contributation for you to gently caress with your eyeballs. The train just keeps on chuggin' with this stuff, so we better keep up the pace.

Today's Guest Contributated review arrives courtesy of SnS forumite and all-around spiffy dood, Beepner, who just so happens to have one of the better internet handles out there (topped only by my old pal, Cpwnin O'Brien). We're goin' back twelve years for this one, as Beepner gives us his thoughts on Shogo: Mobile Armor Division for the PeeSee. Something sweet for all you Gundam/Patlabor/YourDumbMechaShowHere folks out there to chew on for a while.

Man, we got a weird update pattern going on here. Wonder how long it'll last?


-Pollymecha

You Watched Him Play It...
August 9th, 2010

HOW CRAZY IS THIS? LUNCHBREAK AT 11:00AM? I HAVEN'T DONE THIS IN AGES! HOLY CRAPPLE!

Today we invite Mr. Fat Kakashi back to the frontpage for more of that there Secret of Mana business. No, there's nothing left to play, but instead, he's decided to share a few of his final thoughts on the game as a whole with us. What was good? What deserves a little dick-punching? Our one and only FATK is here to give you the lowdown from someone who spent 18,000 hours playing it.

Don't worry! PLENTY MORE GUEST CONTENT COMING! Which is probably a good thing, because a majority of everything left in my back catalog is gonna take some time to run through. Man, you folks were backed up something fierce, weren't you?


-Pollyevenmoremana

The Arcana Is The Means By Which All Is Revealed...
August 7th, 2010

But alas, byronhulcher is still illiterate, so maybe the pretty pictures will drop a revelation or two on his head? We can really only hope.

Do you know what ELSE the Arcana is? Why, it just so happens to be one of those games good ol' Freezepop's decided to run his yapper about. Today, his yapper just so happens to be running about a bit of an obscure JRPG for the SNES entitled (you guessed it!) Arcana. Do drop in and have a look at what he has to say about it. Gosh, it sure would make him happy if you did. (discussion link in review).

Also, anyone looking to Social Link with FreezingInferno should know his Arcana is "The Wiener." Be sure to have an appropriate Persona ready. (THERE'S ONLY ONE THAT QUALIFIES) Just sayin'!


-Pollycana

A Review That Would Make byronhulcher Happy (If He Read This Site)
August 5th, 2010

But alas, byronhulcher is illiterate :(

Got even more fresh meat/new blood today. This here feller calls himself Fishface, so join me in welcoming him to the ranks of SMPS.Net Contributators. In his debut piece, Mr. Fishface has got a big fat fuckin' bone to pick with Final Fantasy Tactics on the PSX. That's right, Pat. Somebody beat you! What do YOU think about good ol' Final Fantasy Tactics in hindsight, all these years later? Well you can always discuss it on the forums.

Also, TWELVE STEPS, TEN RANDOM BATTLES! ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE, PERSONA 1 REMAKE? HURBLHGLHGLHGLHGLH!


-Pollytactics

Battlesocks
August 3rd, 2010

Man, you fuckers are fast. I open the floodgates for Guest Contributatan and you guys get right on the ball! Some new faces are poppin' up around the ol' Circle o' SMPS Contributatan Elite. Glad to see so many people still interested in doing stuff!

Our first brand-new Contributator-type person of the month is one Crono Maniac, and he begins his SMPS Contributatan (Jesus, I'm using that word a lot in this post) career with an old-school review of the NES classic, Battletoads. Now, I know what you're thinking, that everything that could be said about this game has already been said, but I certainly wouldn't have accepted the piece if I thought it was just rehash of what's already been said about it. I thought it was a pretty good take on the game with quite an infamous legacy, and I think you will too. So go over there and readerize it.

You can discuss his review here.

(I'll be creating a discussion thread on the forum for all new content in the future, just by the by.)

There's one or two more pieces of Guest content still sitting in the ol' inbox that I'm getting around to, so stay tuned for those coming up sometime soon.

Until then!


-Pollybattle

We're Getting Back To Normal
August 1st, 2010

HEEEEEEY, KIDS! Nope, this isn't an update, just a quickie announcement for your liesurely Sunday.

This past Friday, the hellish shift I've been working the last few months finally ended. Now I have a nice entire week off to recouperate and do fuck-all nothing, then it's back to my normal, sensible work schedule the week after.

What does this mean for you? Well, it means that things around here are back to normal, and I am now again accepting Guest Contributations to the site full-time. It all works just the same as before, so if you got something you've just been DYING to say the last few months but haven't been able to, now's your chance to have at it.

And that's all!


-Pollyworkssensiblehoursnow